Bridezilla

After over a year of waiting, i am finally at the 1/4 of a year point until my wedding. when i say it's in 3 1/2 months it seems like so short, but october still seems so far away. we have a lot to do, but really we are not in a bad place as far as planning goes.

The closer i get to the wedding the More relaxed i have become about it. a year ago i was headed straight down bridezilla lane. i wanted everything done my way and would not listen to anyone. Then i saw an episode of bridezillas and realized that although those women are extreme, i want no part in treating Kel or anyone else the way they treat the people they love. how could any guy still want to marry them after that. So instead i changed my attitude.

However, there were speed bumps that really tested my attitude. People wanting certain things, people making it about them, and Kel's immediate family's drama causing a lot of emotional baggage. Finally i reached the mature decision that even though i am having a big wedding and inviting A LOT of people, i honestly do no care who comes. the only people are want there are the ones who truly are joyous and willing to celebrate in the wonderful covenant that will take place between Kel and myself (and the ones who want to party and celebrate afterwards). if anyone is there for their own attention or reasons, i don't want them there at all.

for the first time in my life it will be all about me (ok not the first time in my life, everyday is all about me, but for the first time in my new life i am starting with Kel and for the first time where it ACTUALLY is about me and not a made up reason in my life) and kel and out life together.

i am glad a had a long engagement because it took me a year to figure that out with Kel. This makes me wonder what other things i will start to realize in the next year!

Walking on Broken glass...

so, my life is pretty much one big accident! by that i mean a lot of random accidental things always happen to me and there is no rhyme or reason why! for example, this week has been horrible because of random little accidents happening.

First i slipped and spilled my mom's tea all over my dad's computer, and killed it. i felt horrible, but it's one of those things that was a complete accident and out of my control, but still happened and cost my dad a lot of money he didn't need to spend! so that put me in a bad mood.

then at work i have been slipping and making mistakes and not double checking things. this has made me look incompetent and therefore people have been noticing my mistakes and it makes them worse which makes me feel even schmittier!

Finally, at work one day a rock busted the back passenger window of kel's car. it shattered all inside my car and was a mess. However, i do not have to pay for it because my boss is amazing and it's the lawn mower's fault! so normally this would just be a sucky  thing that was handled and no worries! But, because my life can't be simple, i am going to St. Louis with Kel for our anniversary. My car is in no shape to be driven that far and Kel's car (which is the one with the busted window) has a busted window. it was supposed to be fixed at work today, but LITERALLY NO window place in town has the part and so it is impossible to fix.

Kel and i ended up finding a ride (thanks mom) to STL and can still have a good time. i just can't seem to shake off how horrible this week has been and how many little things have turned into dramatic disasters. All of them have had solutions, but it still has given me a huge headache. i feel like i have a big rain cloud over my head. i want to have a good weekend, but i am just drained and scared! i can't handle anything else going wrong, but i am scared that it will!

Quick LIfe Updates!

I hope you know i am writing this instead of going to get myself some mini corndogs for lunch! this is a big deal, i love corndogs and mini ones are just better!

So anyway, life is crazy and hectic and this is a short post because i have no free time. hopefully soon i can update everyone on my life.

for now, here's teh condenced version:

-i had my first bridal shower! i loved it and i loved all the gifts for Kel and I! it makes it so much more realy having ot write thank yous and to have weddiung gifts to sort through in the townhouse!

- work is good, the kids are crazy, but they keep me up and active.

- i picked up another job, at lane bryant! come in and see me some time!

- Kel and i have our 2 year anniversary! SO exciting! we are going to celebrate in STL with the zoo and Galeria! i can't wait~

-wedding plans are great, more detials later!

that's all for now! sorry this is such a bad post, but i will give a more detailed and entertaining one soon!

4 months and 19 days

Summer has always been my busiest time of the year and this summer i am definitely going to be pushing boundaries. I have my job from 7-3 Monday through Friday and because that clearly is not enough i just picked up another job working from 4-close a couple days a week and weekends. when i am not working i am babysitting at the most random times ever.

As crazy as all of this sounds, working is the best solution for me. Kel and i are trying to save SO much money this summer for our life together that i just can't wait until i am down to one full time job and that is it. I am applying for jobs that i WANT right now hoping to get something before i start applying for any and every job that pays a decent salary and has health insurance for me and a family. i am really really hoping to get something i want though!

So yeah this is a boring post. Mostly life is crazy but i am trying to catch up with people  and have a little bit of fun this summer. i fully intend on being a pool rat as much as possible, but seeing how little free time i have we will have to see about how much pool time i get.