it's just like riding a bike....

it's not... at all. rollerblading is not just like riding  a bike. 2 wheels vs. 8 wheels! balance issues are much different and not something you can just pick back up anytime. Yet for some insane reason in convinced myself i could rollerblade after 7 years, 75lbs, two pregnancies and one baby, one VERY SERIOUS ANKLE injury and multiple other smaller injuries and NO KNEE PADS OR ARM PADS (it was too hot for any protective gear, i know it was dumb but i also knew kel would be right there and i felt safe).

I have been going through this weird life crisis. I have considered dying my hair ( like all women do when things go out of control, change out hair) but htat didn't work out so well last time and is a bit expensive if done correctly. Then i considered taking a small weekend trip out of town... except again the money issues and then the whole "my car broke down three different times for three differnet reasons in one week" issue. So you could say i was in desperate need of something "new" in my life or at least something moderately crazy... like rollerblading.

I found my old rollerblades and they fit. So i stood up and rolled down the driveway, then biffed it on my ass hard! First mistake, put your roller blades on at the bottom of any driveway or hill for the first few times. So i got back up while kel and meg tell me to give up, nice try. But being a so calm and non stubborn person that i am i was not giving up after one biff and 0.0000 miles. So i crawled to the grass, stood up on my own, awkward walked to the street and went for a glide around the very small block i live on. It took about 2-3 block glides but i got my roller feet back. already (after 0.017 miles) my legs were burning a bit but in different places than usual form all my walking. It felt SO good.

This is when i decided to try the trail. we have a trail by my house with no major streets and about 1.5 miles is distance. the side wallk to get to the trail is about a 0.25mile wal. it's a perfect little trail. However i have issues (always have always will) with roller blades and side walks... my legs
are too long and hit the grass with my wheels causing chopping balance issues. so i didn't know how to get to the trail... Kel ended up driving me. He walked with Cecelia while i rolled off down the trail. i made it a mile then turned around. It was awesome, going so fast creates a breeze, my legs were burning in a great way and i got my rythm back. so i turned around and headed back. at one point my wheels got caught on a rock and i stumbled, knowing i was going down i rolled into the grass and rolled out of it springing back up (it was cool i wish someone would have seen it other than the two old ladies who freaked out). i kept going and saw kel. after telling him to turn around and head back i passed him and felt good again. then came the bump. It's the only street you have to cross on the whole trail and it has mini curb bumps like all street crossings do. i handled the first one great but the second one caught my back foot and i fell hard on my hands and knees. This might have been one of the least graceful falls this year.

at first i debated removing my roller blades (i could see the car we were really close) and walking, then i realized if i gave up on this today i might as well give up on all the stupid little battles in my life right now. i realize to a normal sane person there is no correlation, but to me these rolled blades are a sign of taking control of my life and not letting stupid derailments stop me. so i got up (blood and all) brushed what i could off and finished my route. it felt good/painful at the same time... just like when i quit mt job 2 months ago it hurt to quit but felt good to stay home, or when we found out we were pregnant- physically painful but so happy to have another one, or when we lost JP -physically felt better than i had in 2 years but emotionally more painful than anything else ever. for the first time in months i got back up and finished, even if it was stupid and petty to begin with. People had told me i shouldn't or couldn't and i did. people said "oh maybe stay on your feet next time and just keep walking" but i wont. i will be out there rollerblading again until i stop falling down. i have broken more bones and suffered more injuries walking/running than i ever did rollerblading (which i did weekly as a kid/adolescent/teen). i refuse to give up on anything in my life and i want people to be behind me cheering me own even when they think it's petty or stupid, not telling me to give up and do something else.If i can finish my 2 miles of rollerblading after 7 years, 75lbs, one beautiful kiddo, 5 surgeries, 1 new ankle and a lifetime (it feels like) of growth and maturity then maybe i can finish, control and take back all the other aspects of my life spiraling away form me right now.