News!

It's been a crazy couple of days for news of all kind!

First on Wednesday i had an interview for a job i have been waiting for months to hear about. The interview went really well.... or so i thought until Thursday when i got the call that they went with the other candidate. I am taking it pretty hard. I've heard/read/received more rejection in the past two months than i  thought possible. the worst part is that i keep hearing "you were great but the other person is more qualified" or that i am "over qualified for the position." the absolute worst is just a generic email "thanks for applying, but we have gone another route in filling this position, however we will let you know if anything opens up." I am so sick of it and so beyond discouraged!

For GREAT new i found out i will be an Aunt again X2! My sister got a call that she will be adopting two little girls, ages 3 and 1! I am really really excited to have two more nieces! and to top it off Kel and I were asked to be Godparents for the one year old! I am SO SO SO SO excited to meet my Goddaughter! It's such a special story and situation! Cecelia gets to have two cousins on one side of the family her age (literally her grade in school, and they will all be going to the same school- God willing- so Cecelia will have TWO cousins in her class in school) and one cousin on the other side of the family in her age! Plus two additional older cousins to grow up with her!

Then i suddenly realized it's been two months since i lost my son. I was doing great for awhile but lately this has hit me pretty hard. If i see a picture of JP2 or the letters JP i loose it. I also know a LOT of women due between January and March and i am still adjusting to the thought it's not me. Every night Cecelia and i say our prayers and ask for her brother JP to pray for her. She points up a the ceiling fan-we have wind chimes hanging from them-and we ring them when we talk to JP. She is such a sweetheart and loves babies, her baby doll or anything in a baby swing or seat. She would be such a good big sister and it kills me that she wont get to hold her brother. Aside form when she put my mother's doll in the toilet (hey, Bitty Babies need to go potty too!), she would be an amazing big sister!

It's so hard, balancing happy and sad news! It all came in one hour. I'm so excited to see my sister's prayers answered! All of our prayers really, we have all been hoping and waiting to see her/our extended family grow! I never thought that my daughter would be the only white kid in the group, and now that we have it that way i would not change it for the world! On the other hand, i'm so discouraged and trying very hard not to let depression set in. I have a lot to be thankful for, but i also have had so much taken away from me in the past few months! i've never really felt this helpless in my own life. It's really not a good feeling, at all!